Simple

Flawless light in a darkening air
Alone...and shining there
Love will not elude you
Love is simple

I worship this tenacity
And the beautiful struggle we’re in
Love will not elude us
Love is simple

Be sure to know that
All in love
Is ours
And love, as a philosophy,
Is simple

I am calm in oblivion
As calm, as I ever have been
Love will not elude me
Love is simple

Be sure to know that
All in love
Is ours...
Is ours...

That all in love
Is ours

And love, as a philosophy,
Is simple...
And ours...

I adore k. d. lang's voice and I really like the lyrics of this song. They serve as a nice counter to the common conception of love (especially romantic love) as necessarily dramatic, complicated, and painful. Of course, difficulties do arise when dealing with another human being and their needs and desires. Humans are complex creatures and no two are alike. But while I know that love isn't always easy (it certainly can be a "beautiful struggle"), I refuse to believe that it has to be painful to be real.

I've done difficult love, melodramatic love, starstruck love. Like most of us, I was raised on this version of love. But I want a love that doesn't include pain as a central component and that isn't based on overcoming what keeps us apart (whether those things are bound up in external circumstances or in conflicting personalities). I want a love that has at its core something positive: not just physical attraction, but also common interests, shared humor and values, respect and admiration for one another, and, only after all of that is there, a willingness to work together toward the betterment of both parties.

It's taken me a long time to reach this point, but I don't think that a healthy, happy love is too much to ask for. In fact, I think it's within my grasp.